Feel of the Day.98

Hmmm...Where and how to start :/

So much has happened lately, so may firsts, both regretful ones and happy-i-did-it ones.
Emotionally, im a wreck...I feel as if im standing on a beach, with both feel plunged into the sea-infused sand. No matter where i try to stand or how i try to stand, there seems to be no stable ground.

My usual "rock" which i look forward to and think about when life gives me hell is the new hell itself. and soo you seee, this cycle of epic failness. not fun.
I dont know what to do, nor do i know where to go from here. A train wreck, a tsunami, an earthquake that's shaken the soul outta me...

But i am thankful for a few "stones" which has provided me with some certainty when im walking on the squishy unstable sand along the shore of failness. I thank you all very much! :) for helping me to stand up and walk!

Now, the rock...hmmm sometimes crap is the crap that it is, simply due to one pigment of WHYDOUDOTHIS?! -period-

But at the same timee, ive experienced things that ive never even thought about before (well, i have, just didnt expect the acuteness of the event) (haha i know this sounds wrong but mehhh gotta keep it on the D-low, its nothing dodge, promisee :p). The whole process was stressful, exciting and hopeful as well.

Although now the event has resolved, and what was hoped to be rice is simply uncooked solid grains of rice soaking in a pail of cloudy water, why? because the power wasnt plugged in, its not the right time to plug it in yet. But rice was what i wanted! im sure of it, but Never Mind...the lack-of-power beg to differ and now im end up with no rice. I dont blame the cooker, nor do i blame pigments or power points, and as much as i wana move on to noodles, i think somewhere inside i still long for rice...at least for now.

I just want things to de-complexify! back to the good old "relax and chill" and "no worries" timesss, when Apples can be whatever it wants to be and can express however it wants to express itself, without a feeling that the pears and grapes are ...(dno the word for it)...

Y'know, it might just be that the apple is simply kept under the shade for too long, making it to think that there's a storm, but rather, its simply situated under a bunch of leaves/shades. Open your eyes apples! look beyond the immediate shade, look far and above to the sun :)

I need the shore to solidify...to the way things were before...

alvin.k